Tuesday, April 10, 2012

ashleyjuddenfreude

Ashley Judd "slapped the media" this past week for remarks made across several outlets over a 24-hour period after one comment about her face being "puffy" and the speculation that she'd "had work done." In its typical feeding frenzy fashion, other "journalists" picked up on the story and ran with it, leading to numerous unsubstantiated comments from people who'd never met her, including plastic surgeons, without one reporter or media outlet ever contacting Ms. Judd for verification or comment.

Many of the reporters or commentators were women, and therefore the thrust of Ms. Judd's reaction was lamenting the fact that all of this seems to be coming from a place of institutional or societal misogyny--that the patriarchal system, promulgated by both men AND women, creates an environment where women are objectified and devalued for anything other than their physical attributes, and that any "slippage" in that arena is celebrated by other women, ostensibly because this system puts all women in competition with each other for male approval.

She made a lot of salient points, and I tend to agree with most of what she said. However, I think one thing she kind of overlooked which plays a major role in all this is that maybe it's not nearly as much about misogyny, as it is about schadenfreude. I think people in general operate from a place of envy of ANYONE, male or female, who they think is smarter, prettier, richer, more talented, etc., than they are.

This isn't any new idea, this "we build them up so we can tear them down" relationship the pubic has with its celebrities. They do become icons or idols or metaphors larger than their own personal humanity--they are the archtypes on which we hang all of the Homeric and Sophoclean epics and tragedies--the same stories of the fatal flaws retold for our own generation. We project EVERYTHING upon them, reflecting the love-hate relationships we have with ourselves: our dreams of being beautiful and successful, our disappointment when we don't measure up. Which is where the schadenfreude really comes in handy...when we are disappointed with ourselves, we look to find someone or something else to distract us--something to say to us, "well, even the one I THOUGHT had everything, doesn't," and, though it's a shameful thing to admit, it makes us feel a little bit better about ourselves.

So in the context of Ms. Judd's experiences overall this past week or so, I think the picture is a little broader than just the ongoing "male vs. female" battle, but she was correct in calling to task the women that engaged in it--until women stop being complicit in their own degradation, the battle will rage on to their detriment.

But I don't know if that's even really possible--genetically, societally, biologically, anthropologically. We are animals wired for procreation, with a "survival of the fittest" edict encoded into our genes. Even with the vast, multi-faceted landscape that is modern, liberated, enlightened human sexuality, there is, at its core, this primal dance that was designed to bring the smartest and strongest of the species together to ensure its endurance, and we are, in spite of our evolved, self-actualized selves, slaves to our visceral reactions: if something is outwardly, visually pretty, IT ATTRACTS US. WE LIKE IT. We each may have different tastes of what we find most attractive, but there is that "Golden Ratio" that steers our instincts. Some people just ARE more attractive than the others, and, by virtue of that attractiveness, those people draw more attention, and ultimately have more choices and opportunities across the entire spectrum of what comprises a life, which, unfortunately, subjects them to the envy of others.

I guess my point here (or one of them, anyway--I'm admittedly all over the map, as usual), is that if it weren't for the fact that Ashley Judd was remarkably beautiful, intelligent, and talented to begin with, no one would bother to make these comparisons or comments about her. I'm not saying that makes it okay, or that she's fair game because she's a celebrity. But what I AM saying is that for the vast majority of people (like me) who fall just at or below "average" attractiveness/talent/intelligence, it's kind of difficult to raise the banner alongside her. I'm very happy to have her stand up for the cause that people shouldn't be judged by their attractiveness, but that's awfully easy for someone like her to say. And I guess I should be grateful that there are "beautiful" people who care about people like me, and, even moreso, about people so much less fortunate than I am, which she apparently does, as evidenced by her extensive work with numerous human rights causes. That certainly makes her a better person than me.

Which is why, sometimes, we all need a little shadenfreude. Or ashleyjuddenfreude.